


I'm Not A Writer I Just Drink A Lot About It

by Exquisiteliltart



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F, Swan Queen - Freeform, Writing, happy endings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-20
Updated: 2014-12-02
Packaged: 2018-02-26 10:17:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 20,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2648381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Exquisiteliltart/pseuds/Exquisiteliltart
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Regina decides to write her own happy ending and Emma helps.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I Know How It Goes

**Author's Note:**

> Title and story inspired by Dessa's song "Mineshaft " and the lyric: "The list of things I used to be is longer than the list of things I am..."

"Mom, other Mom is kind of going off the handle, you need to go help her!" Henry ran into the apartment out of breath. His words came out in a rush as he slung his back pack down on the counter.

Emma stopped eating her bowl of cereal mid bite, "Slow down, kid. What are you talking about?"

"Okay, so me and Mom had this mission…it's secret, but I think you need to know. She wanted to find the writer of the book and make them write her a new story. She wants a happy ending," Henry jumped up on a stool and put his hands on his head.

"Did she find out who the writer is?" Curiosity taking hold, Emma pushed her bowl away and focused her full attention on her son.

"Yes, we found the writers and she's…not happy. Now she's trying to write it herself and it's pretty scary," Henry had just come from his house where he had found Regina holed up in her study, with scraps of wadded up paper all over the floor. "You have to help her. She wouldn't listen to me."

"I'm on it. I don't know if she'll listen to me either, but I'll try," Emma put on her coat and boots and was already half way to the door.

"What are you going to do? I'm afraid she's going to mess everything up. Things that are written in the book come true," Henry frowned and kicked the counter urgently unconsciously trying to get rid of his nervous energy.

"She wants a happy ending, right? So how bad could she mess that up?" Emma paused and thought for a moment, "Uh, don't answer that…I'll hurry. Just stay here and try not to fade into non-existence."

She left the apartment and took the stairs two at a time. Hopping into her bug, she ignited the engine and hit the gas. It didn't surprise her that Regina was trying to take matters into her own hands, but she knew that she didn't always think things through before putting plans into action, or in this case: words onto the page.

Pulling up in the driveway, she already had the car door open as she pushed the bug into park and turned the key. She jogged up the walkway and pounded on the door. Impatiently, she hopped from foot to foot and shook her head as she turned the handle, finding the door unlocked she pushed it open and stepped over the threshold.

"Regina?" She called from the foyer and hesitantly stepped in further when she was met with silence. She headed for the study and pressed her ear to the door before knocking a bit more lightly.

"Henry, I told you I need to be left alone," a muffled voice called from the other side. Regina sounded supremely frustrated and Emma took that was a very bad sign.

"It's not Henry…it's Emma," she tried to make her voice sound sweet and light, like she was just stopping by for a glass of cider and a friendly chat.

Emma was again met with silence, but she heard footsteps coming closer, "Did Henry send you?"

"Regina just let me in so we can talk. Henry said you're up to something….maybe I can help?"

The door opened and Regina stuck her head out, she was wearing glasses perched on the edge of her nose and an angry frown. "No, Ms. Swan, I don't think you can help. Now kindly leave my property, I am very busy."

"Writing a new happy ending into the book?"

Regina's mouth opened a bit in surprise and her face softened for a minute, "He told you?"

"Yeah, he's worried. Thinks you're going to destroy the town or rewrite history. Said you found the writer of the book too," Emma stepped closer, meeting Regina's eyes and holding her gaze. She could tell she was close to giving in and spilling her secrets and discoveries.

Regina rolled her eyes and looked to the floor, "I did," she spoke softly and slowly, "but those writers are worthless. I'm much better off writing my own story."

"Where did you find the writers?" Emma pushed her way forward, forcing Regina to take a step back. Emma placed her palm on the door and pushed it open wider letting herself into the study. She immediately noticed scattered sheets of paper and wadded up piles lying near the file place.

"I searched high and low for the devilish authors of this book that holds so much power over my life-over all of our lives, and I finally found them in the place I least expected to…," Regina sighed audibly and crossed the room, sitting back down behind her desk and turning her attention to the burning fire. The light played across her face casting shadows and light. Emma shoved her hands in her pockets and took off her coat.

Regina spoke one word low and menacing, as if the very act of saying it hurt her lips, "Twitter."

"No shit? Twitter?" Emma's raised her eyebrows in disbelief. "So did you tweet the writers?"

"I did…140 characters at a time…I sent messages to this Adam and Eddie, and I demanded they write me a better story, and give me the happy ending I deserve."

"And what did they say?" Emma leaned in to focus her attention on coaxing Regina to continue to open up.

"They said nothing of use. That they don't write 'ships' and 'the stories tell themselves' it was very disappointing, and I'm not the only one who is upset. Apparently, the writers have inflamed thousands based on the number of tweets they are receiving about their stories."

"How are you sure that these are the guys that have control?" Emma was confused by the whole situation, but she had learned to disregard nothing when magic was at play. She still hadn't figured out all of the rules that went along with using her magic. Sometimes it worked a certain way and other times it was completely different. There was no rhyme or reason to it. As she thought more about it, she had a question or two for these writers as well.

"Oh, I'm quite sure that they are the ones. They posted a 'script tease' from an upcoming event that is going to happen soon. It was cryptic," Regina shuddered and crossed her arms and legs, sitting back in her chair. Emma could tell she was feeling hopeless and fighting back tears. Regina perked up and shifted, her demeanor changing, "But it's no matter. I plan to write my own happy ending, but as you can see…I'm having a bit of trouble."

"I'm sorry your search ended this way, but at least you know who is responsible for your story," Emma stood up and crossed the room. She unfurled one of the crumpled failed writing attempts and read the page, "and the former queen, her true love and her loving son, Henry lived happily ever after."

"That story is too short. I need to write more details. I thought I could just write a generic summary, but that does not seem to be the case," the brunette picked up her pencil and tapped it on the surface of the desk. "I thought Robin was my true love, but the damned book has written another story for him: a story that does not include me."

Emma had an idea; she grabbed a chair and brought it around to sit next to Regina, "Let's try something. I did this exercise back when I was in prison as part of group therapy to help us focus on our goals. We're going to make a list of all the qualities you want in your true love."

She snatched the pencil from Regina and took a fresh she of paper, writing at top of the page "Regina's true love" and underlining it, "What are some must haves?"

Regina rolled her eyes, she thought the exercise was stupid, but none-the-less she was feeling desperate so she'd give foolish Emma the benefit of the doubt and play along."I'm not sure what you mean by 'qualities'?

"Like is he handsome, strong…truthful. What do you look for most in a man?" Emma was ready to write, and she knew Regina just needed a little bit of prompting.

After weighing things out in her head for a moment, Regina spoke, "Yes, I suppose strength is important, as well as someone who enjoys spending time with me. He doesn't necessarily have to have all of my same interests, but he must respect me. There has to be chemistry, and he must be good in bed and able to please me in all ways."

Emma finished scrawling 'good in bed' on the sheet and looked up, "What else?"

"I don't want to get too particular, but he also has to be good with Henry; someone who really cares about him and his well being. Henry must like him as well. I need someone who I can trust and who can meet me eye to eye, and knows what to do with magic," Regina looked at Emma, her eyes flitting to the page, "Are you getting all of this down, Ms. Swan? I don't want to have to repeat myself."

Emma wrote, 'trust' followed by 'handle her issues,' and 'magical' on the page, 'Yeah, yeah. I'm all caught up…what about affection? Do you like to hold hands and cuddle?"

A blush heated Regina's cheeks and she straightened up in her chair, bristling, "That is rather personal. Why does any of that matter?"

The blonde smiled and wrote something on the sheet, putting her hand over the list so the other woman couldn't see, and mischievously commented, "This is fun."

Regina grabbed her hand and tried to pull it back from the page, "What are you writing? Let me see at once. This is my happy ending after all."

After a bit of hand war, Regina swooped in and grabbed the paper, bringing to it closer to her eyes, reading out loud, "loves to cuddle'…I didn't say that…you're taking creative liberties!"

"Don't be so dramatic, so what if you like cuddling? So do I. Don't be embarrassed, it doesn't make you weak or anything," Emma placed a hand on Regina's arm and looked into her eyes, "I really want to help you, and maybe there are some qualities you need in your true love that you don't even know you need."

"Shall we move on?" Regina brushed her hand off and swallowed, keeping her expression neutral.

"Right, so how about physical attributes?" Emma rubbed her palms together and stole the paper back from Regina, poising her pencil and ready to write. "Hair and eye color?"

"I'm not particular, though perhaps I prefer blonde or brunette…no red heads."

"Aw, you're going to crush Dr. Hopper's chances," Emma joked and nudged Regina's shoulder, who was finally beginning to relax and not take it so seriously.

Regina cracked a half smile at Emma's joke and continued, "And blue or green eyes, I suppose I prefer a contrast to myself. I want someone who is fit and toned, but not too many bulging muscles."

"Alright, where are we going to find this Mr. Happy Ending? You might have to cast a wider net than Storybrooke," Emma reread the list and thought it was a pretty good start. She'd save writing the qualities Regina didn't want in a partner for later, as that list was sure to be a long one.

"You do know that you are featured in the book as well, and your happy ending has not yet been written," Regina took the pencil out of Emma's hand and drew a line down the middle of the page, separating Regina's list and starting a list for Emma's true love.

"Now, I write and you tell me the qualities that Emma Swan must have in her true love. Assuredly, that pirate doesn't possess your heart?"

Emma furrowed her brow and crossed her arms, "Now who is getting personal? I never asked to be in this stupid fairytale book, I just want to live my life, and I don't want to talk about Killian, okay? We're kind of on the outs. He's been lying to me about a lot of things so I guess honesty is kinda important to me. Go ahead and put that on the list."

She wrote 'honesty' in on Emma's column in her neat script, contrasted to Emma's blocky lettering. "How do you feel about romance: love letters and special dates?"

"I tried that before and well, going out to a fancy restaurant and getting flowers is nice, but I'm just as happy having a couch date with takeout and a good movie," Emma scrunched her nose, even though the topic wasn't anything that should make her uncomfortable she always felt strange talking about her own wants and needs. She was trying to help Regina; this wasn't about her in any way.

Emma watched her write a few more words and stood up to stretch her back and stoke the fire with the poker.

"Very good," Regina commented and continued to write.

"Do you really think any of this will come true? We'd probably be better off filling out an online dating profile and trying to find some hot dates that way," Emma moved back to the desk and sat back down taking the piece of paper and reading it over. Regina had added, 'Someone unique, special and understanding' to Emma's column.

"Would you like refreshment, Ms. Swan?" Regina walked across the room, pulling two glasses from a shelf and reaching for her decanter of cider.

"Sure," Emma shrugged deciding she could really use a drink if they were to continue down this path.

As Regina poured the drinks she asked over her shoulder, "Why don't you describe your perfect suitor to me and I'll see if any man in this town comes to mind?"

Rolling her eyes as she drew a blank while trying to imagine her ideal mate she took a breath and felt her heart flutter nervously. Emma corrected her, "It doesn't just have to be a man; I wouldn't mind a woman true love if we're being honest."

"Is that so?" Regina turned around quickly and pursed her lips in confusion. "You..you are interested in women- sexually?"

"Don't make a big deal of it," Emma mumbled, wringing her hands together. "I don't want to limit myself is all…and when I try to picture my future, it's just sometimes I can see myself with a woman."

Something indefinable crossed Regina's features as she extended her hand holding the glass of cider out to Emma and she sat down. She inhaled a sharp breath and then took a long drink from her glass. She seemed to be lost in thought until Emma gently nudged her shoulder.

"What are you thinking about?"

Regina's eyes fluttered open and she took Emma's hand, "I think I've been going about this the wrong way…I never realized, well, I never thought…but what you just said…"

"Yes?" Emma had never seen Regina act so flustered and unable to string her thoughts together into words. She held her eyes giving her full attention to the woman next to her.

"What I'm trying to say is that I don't want to limit myself either."

"Yeah, well, I think it's best to keep the options open. Not that I'm in any rush to find someone. I haven't had the best luck so far and I'm not sure I want to hand over my fate to a dumb book."

"Unfortunately, fate controls everything in my life, and fate is a cruel mistress," Regina looked over the list and fought the urge to crumple up the paper and toss it into the fire. "We're not getting anywhere. This is pointless."

"Hey, don't think like that. Don't give up hope, I don't think our whole future can change magically over night, but at least we're working towards something," Emma rubbed the back of her neck; she felt the pinch of headache coming on.

"You sound just like your mother. 'Hope this, hope that," sighing, Regina stared at the pencil and squinted before picking it up and urging Emma to continue. "Let's get on with it; please continue with your ideal true love."

Emma had never really thought about it. People just seemed to come in and out of her life, "The Henry thing is also important, I gotta be with someone who loves our kid. I need someone who challenges me, but is also supportive and doesn't place me on some pedestal because I'm the savior or whatever everyone thinks I'm supposed to be."

"Hmm, someone who sees your potential," Regina agreed, writing it down before taking a drink from her cider and glancing over at the Sheriff.

"Yeah, but just letting me be me, cause I've made mistakes, but I try to be a good person."

"Of course, you are. No one questions your goodness, look at your lineage," Regina tried to sound bitter and hard, but the cider was having the desired effect and she felt relaxed. Her words came out lilting and soft.

"See, I don't want to be known only as the daughter of Snow White and Prince Charming. That's a part of who I am, but I didn't even know the truth until recently. I don't typically dwell on the past…"

"That's what makes you so forgiving," Regina noted, as she cross her ankles under the desk and used her toes to push off her heels. She sunk down in the chair to rest her eyes. She wasn't used to writing, and she didn't know how they were going to configure their desires for true love into a narrative story.

"I guess, but I don't know. I don't even know who I want to be yet, let alone figuring out all the things I want in someone else," Emma blew a strand of golden hair out of her face and slumped back in her chair, crossing her arms over her chest. The fire had heated the room considerably, and both women felt the flush from the alcohol.

"I think I need some fresh air. Why don't we pause for tonight? Perhaps tomorrow we could write some more if you are so bent on helping, that is?" Regina stood up primly and Emma did the same.

"Yeah, I'll think on some more ideas for your happy ending and let Henry know that everything is under control," Emma smiled, finding it surprising that the more time she spent really talking with Regina the more she enjoyed her company. It was rare that the woman was as open and seemingly vulnerable as she was now, and it was nice to see the softer side.

"Yes, I have a lot to think about," Regina escorted Emma to the door, where they both stood across from one another, unsure of how to end their time together. Regina spoke with uncertainty, "Emma, thank you for coming. You did help put things in perspective."

"I did promise that I won't stop until you find your happy ending, and that's a promise I intend to keep," Emma nodded and opened the door. "Good night, Regina."

"Good night."

When the door closed, Regina leaned against it and squeezed her eyes shut. She had true love twice now and lost it both times, what if she was out of chances? The conversation that she had with Emma replayed in her mind. Maybe she shouldn't be looking for qualities in her ideal true love, but thinking about the qualities she desired in herself. When she thought about what someone could possibly see in her, she thought of all the things she used to be, but now, now she was just Regina and she felt like a stranger to herself.


	2. Lo Mein and Movies

"Did you help Mom with her story?" Henry bounced on heels as he greeted Emma when she walked in the door.

"Yeah, we started at least," she replied, taking off her coat and walking immediately to the living room to sit on the couch. "It's not so simple, and I think we're trying too hard. Don't worry we'll get it figured out."

"Okay, so…are you good at writing?" Henry plopped down next to her and raised his eyebrows waiting hopefully for an answer.

"I haven't written anything in a long time. I think for what we need to accomplish I need to do some research or get a writing guide," Emma searched the cushions for the remote, and pushed the power button to turn on the TV. She flipped idly through the channels and was greeted by glimpses of images of couples in love. "Life isn't quite as simple as a romantic comedy."

"The book sticks to classic fairytale stories so just find a plot that works and write Mom into it. The book will do the rest, I'm sure of it," Henry was getting excited about the idea.

Emma wasn't convinced, but she decided she'd figure it out the next day. "We're going to work on it tomorrow night, so I have some time to think about it."

"Alright, let me know if you need any help! I'm going to bed," Henry hopped off the couch and retreated to his sleeping area.

"Good night, kid."

…

Regina couldn't sleep, she turned over in her satin sheets as fears and pitfalls played out like nightmares in her very conscious mind. She wished she could be more like Emma and live in the moment, taking things as they came. She had lived in the past for so long, and now she constantly worried about her future.

She had once believed enacting the curse was her guaranteed happy ending, but that had been a perpetual present and still she had not found true happiness. She willed her heart to slow down and took a deep breath. She closed her eyes as warm tears leaked down her cheeks.

…

The morning was unseasonably cold, and Emma shivered as she warmed up her car and headed to the Sheriff's station. The day went by slowly and by mid-afternoon she was feeling anxious and unproductive. She was ready to get over to Regina's and work on the story.

As she was leaving the station, her stomach grumbled from hunger and she realized she hadn't had much to eat. She stopped at the one Chinese restaurant in town and ordered far too much take out. Just as her order came up, the power went out. When she stepped out into the street it looked like the blackout was affecting the whole town.

Placing a call to Mary Margaret she was assured that everyone was fine, and that Mary Margaret was working on restoring power. Apparently, she had never bothered to the fix the main power source and the town had been running on the backup generator since the last power outage debacle. Emma rolled her eyes and sighed heavily when she hung up the phone.

She pulled up to Regina's house, which looked eerie with no lights on inside. Maybe she'd want to reschedule, but Emma had brought enough Chinese food for an army and Regina did have a nice warm fireplace. She balanced her lap top under her arm along with the bags of food as she knocked on the door.

"Emma, I didn't know if you were still coming with the power outage. I'm afraid it's getting chilly in here," she said as a gust of wind whistled through the door and ushered Emma inside, closing the door behind her, "What is that smell?"

The blonde smiled and held up the food, "I brought sustenance and entertainment."

Candles lined the hallway flickering as the women passed by and headed into the study. A fire was heating the room, but it was still cold. Emma sat the food down and placed her lap top on the coffee table.

"I was thinking we need to do some research so I brought some movies that highlight potential happy endings we could write for you," She started to open up containers of sweet and sour sauce and lo mein, digging a pair of chopsticks out of the bag and reclining on the sofa. "Have some food."

She jiggled the bag and patted the sofa, while Regina continued to stand and watch her. She was feeling rather hungry, though greasy MSG laden food wasn't on her typical diet plan, she was unable to cook anything with the power being out.

"If you spill a drop of that sticky red liquid on my rug, so help me," Regina sat down and daintily picked through the containers find some pork fried rice. "I should get us some plates and proper silverware. I see that you seem to be managing just fine using those two little sticks."

"Lots of practice," Emma said between mouthfuls, "No need for plates, just eat it out of the carton. It tastes better that way."

Regina scoffed, and sighed, but she unfolded the lid of the container and opened her packet of chopsticks. She placed a napkin elegantly on her lap and mirrored Emma's hand position to get the hang of the chopsticks. After a few bites while Emma slurped noodles and Regina chewed tiny bites of rice they sat in companionable silence. "Not bad," Regina acquiesced.

Emma leaned over and dug her chopsticks into Regina's container swiping a load of rice and spilling some across the couch cushions as she leaned forward and pulled it into her mouth. "Mmm…try this."

She snagged a piece of chicken and dropped it in Regina's container, while Regina looked back and forth between Emma and her container of chicken. Her eyes drifting to the kernels of rice that dotted her sofa, "When the power comes back, I hope you know you'll be vacuuming up your crumbs."

"Sorry," Emma said taking in another mouthful of noodles with a smile, as she watched Regina eat.

"You brought movies for us to watch, I assume to glean some ideas for the story?" Regina shivered, the fire only put out so much heat, but the rest of the house had rapidly lost all traces of heat. She sat her carton down and walked over to a cabinet to pull out a few blankets. She wrapped one around herself and sat back down.

"Yeah, I brought a bunch of movies, raided Mary Margaret's collection so most of them are pretty cheesy, but it might give us some ideas," Emma licked her fingers and reached forward to the coffee table to power up her lap top. "The battery should last for awhile."

Regina flitted through the various DVDs, frowning in disapproval as she went through the stack. More happy looking couples all adorned the shiny covers. She paused to study the cover of one titled, "Imagine Me and You."

Emma tugged on the edge of the blanket that Regina was wrapped in, "My ass is cold. Sharing is caring."

Scowling, Regina wordlessly shifted and let Emma have a corner of the blanket and she scooted a little closer to spread it over her lap. She snatched the DVD from the brunette's hand and popped it out of its case, placing it in the DVD cradle.

"I didn't say I wanted to watch that one," Regina snarled, but made no further protest.

"If it sucks, we'll try a different one. We have to start somewhere."

The DVD menu popped up and Emma leaned forward to hit play, and quickly put her cold fingers back under the blanket. The movie started to play as they sad awkwardly side by side and tried to focus.

"I can't hear it. Can you turn up the volume?"

"It's as loud as it goes. Emma grabbed the lap top and placed it on her lap. "I'd hook it up to your TV but with the power outage, this is all we can do."

Regina scooted just a bit closer, but still couldn't hear or see enough to get into the film, "Let me hold it." She snatched the computer from Emma's lap and placed it on her own, leaning back into the cushions of the sofa.

"Now I can't see," Emma scooted closer, and folded her knees under her, propping her head on her hand, practically leaning on Regina's shoulder. At first, Regina felt uncomfortable with the Emma so close, but the woman was a nice source of heat, accompanied from the warmth of the lap top on her thighs.

"Better?" Regina tried to relax and enjoy the film.

"Yeah, a little," Emma cleared her throat and leaned in even closer. "You know I was thinking about the concept of happiness. I like the idea of a happily ever after, but I just don't think that no matter what we write in the story, life is never going to be one ongoing continuum of 'happiness' forever and ever."

"Of course it will. That's what a happy ending is," Regina shifted to face her with a questioning look on her face.

"Happiness to me is just nice moments that happen hopefully frequently, but even in a happy ending there are bound to be setbacks and problems. No one is happy all of the time," Emma gazed off into the fire and whispered, "I mean I feel pretty happy right now, but I don't expect to feel like this forever…like when you're inevitably going to kick me out into the cold dark night."

"Enjoy it while it lasts then," Regina teased, "Now be quiet, I'm trying to watch this."

A few minutes passed in relative silence until Emma spoke up again, "I'm still cold." She made her point by sneaking her cold fingers under the hem of Regina's shirt and skimming them across her back. The older woman jumped and twisted away from her, letting out a nervous chuckle.

"I don't know why it's my responsibility to solve your problem, take more of the blanket or put another log on the fire if you're so cold. You're welcome to leave at any time and seek warmth elsewhere," Regina snapped, but her voice didn't hold any bite just a little bark. She sounded almost playfully angry.

"Okay, geez," Emma stood up to add more wood to the fire and Regina unwittingly missed her warmth immediately. Emma sulked back to the couch and sat on the far side with her arms crossed and hands in her armpits, sulking.

"You can't see the screen from there, come back over here. You're being obstinate."

'No, no I'll just stay here and be cold if you don't want to share your blanket, just let me freeze," Emma said in her most guilt inducing voice. She was taking a risk that Regina would even care, but she could tell that the other woman was just as cold without her by her side.

"I don't want to incite an argument. I have more important things to worry about," Straightening on the couch Regina partially uncurled the blanket from beneath her and spread it out towards Emma. "I know you can't see the movie from over there, and you're job is to help me see if this story has any elements I want to include in my own."

Holding out for just another minute, Emma reluctantly slid over on the couch at the same moment Regina scooted over so their thighs brushed together under the blanket.

"Feel my poor hands," Emma slid her right hand into Regina's left and held it. They both exhaled simultaneously and settled in, neither woman letting go.

A few more minutes passed as they both pretended to watch the film, though if they were going to explain what was happening with the plot both would fail miserably. Regina lost herself in thought. It was certainly convenient that Emma had shown up with takeout on a cold night with the power out.

"Are you really happy right now?" Regina turned slightly, her eyes dark as she implored the blonde. She didn't want to admit it, but Emma might be onto something with her view of happy moments.

"Yeah, I'm full of Chinese food, nothing to be sad about. And I'm feeling more comfortable now that you're being…accommodating," Emma shyly squeezed her hand and smiled softly.

Nodding almost imperceptibly Regina finally felt warmth spread over her, and realized it had nothing to do with her physical climate. Stopping to evaluate her feelings was a difficult concept for her to grasp, but in this moment she realized she felt happy too. The lack of sleep from worry the night before was catching up with her. She knew she couldn't do any decent writing feeling so exhausted. She let her eyes slide shut and listened to the crackle of the fire and the music from the soundtrack of the film.

"Regina?" Emma felt her hand go slack as she drifted slowly over, leaning fully against Emma as she slept peacefully. Carefully, as not to wake her, Emma slid the lap top off of her and closed the lid. She wrapped her arms securely around her and let herself drift off to sleep in front of the fire.


	3. Put all your words away

Regina woke up in a daze, stirring only slightly, before she even opened her eyes she felt the warmth and safety of being locked in another's embrace. The events of the evening before pieced together in her mind and the last thing she recalled was falling asleep on her sofa with Emma.

She realized she was cocooned in a warm blanket and the air outside their little bubble was so cold. The fire had long ago gone out and the faint smell of smoke hung in the air. It was completely dark in the windowless room. Her back was pressed against the couch cushions and her front was pressed against Emma. The blanket was tucked in tight all around them, keeping the warmth in and the cold out.

There was something about being in the presence of the proclaimed Savior that Regina always felt when near her, but being so close, it was positively radiating. She couldn't quite describe it, but it was as if Emma gave off a feeling that everything was going to work out and be okay. It may not be pretty and everything might not go smoothly, but when all was said and done, it would work out for the best. Her first instinct was to pull away and out of the embrace, but to do so would mean she'd have to leave the little nest and venture into the cold. The prospect was not tempting, but staying nestled against the other woman was strange. It felt better than Regina was willing to admit.

For once it wasn't about taking action, it was easier and safer to not do anything and let herself be held. She thought about using magic and just teleporting herself into her own bed, but she knew the sheets would be cold and she'd be too far away from this wonderful feeling. The tip of her nose was freezing, so she just nuzzled into the crook of Emma's neck as she heard the blonde sigh contentedly and strong arms wrapped tighter around her, pulling them closer together.

She let herself relax and let sleep overtake her once more.

…

When Emma woke up, she found Regina snuggled against her chest as innocent and fragile looking as a child. The warm pressure against her and having the trust of the other woman felt just right. She slowly rubbed soothing circles up and down Regina's back and whispered to her for her to wake her up slowly. She didn't want her to be alarmed, and the idea that they shouldn't have fallen asleep like this crossed Emma's thoughts, but it had been the best rest she'd had in ages, even if the sofa really wasn't big enough or soft enough. Sharing a small hard throw pillow wasn't ideal; at least they were warm.

In fact, she felt quite heated as Regina continued to breathe even puffs against her neck; one hand was wrapped around her back, coiled firmly in her hair, and the other resting possessively on her hip. She swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat and cleared it sufficiently, patting Regina's back to wake her.

"Regina?" Emma whispered a bit louder and slightly more urgently, "Wake up."

Finally, Regina's head moved back and she peered up with sleepy eyes and gazed into Emma's, "What time is it?"

"Um, I don't know," Emma glanced around and her brow furrowed in puzzlement. Regina didn't tense up or push away; instead she simply turned her head and yawned, stretching lazily before burrowing more tightly under the covers.

"Aren't you wondering how we ended up sleeping together on your couch?" Emma cringed as she asked, hating to break the moment and definitely dreading leaving the sanctuary underneath the blanket, but she felt this needed to be discussed.

"No," Regina muttered as her eyes slipped closed, "Go back to sleep."

"I kinda have to get up," Emma spoke plainly as she slid her arms off of Regina's back and tried to turn away.

"No, it's so cold in here, just stay right where you are," Regina fumbled blindly for Emma's arms and attempted to direct them back to her body.

"Your knee has been wedged against my bladder for the past six hours; I gotta get up," Emma finally pulled free, quickly extricating herself and falling off the couch onto her knees. She pushed the edges of the blanket around Regina as she shivered in the cold, dark room.

Regina grumbled loudly in protest as she sat up slowly, tucking the blanket around her securely and smoothing her messy hair behind her ears. She wasn't going to be able to go back to sleep now. Not with her source of safety and warmth leaving so abruptly.

"You're not going home are you? We didn't get anything accomplished last night," Regina didn't mean to sound aggravated or whine, but she couldn't help it. The words tumbled out as a plea.

"No, that's because someone fell asleep before the movie was even half way through," Emma goaded as she glared at Regina.

"Well, I needed my rest, obviously. I'm feeling much better now, so we can do some work on my happy ending. You are the one so gung ho to help after all," Regina turned over to face the back of the couch, feeling exhilarated by the morning argument. She suppressed a smile and closed her eyes, knowing she was not going to get back to sleep anytime soon.

"Okay, just let me go pee and I'll be right back," Emma scrambled to her feet, unbuttoning her jeans as she dashed out of the room.

…

A few minutes later, Emma returned and Regina sat up on the couch with her knees curled underneath her and the blanket tucked up to her chin. Emma shivered as she went to start a new fire as Regina commanded her on how to properly build it from across the room.

"I can't believe the power is still out. I hope the pipes don't freeze. I should probably go find Mary Margaret and see if she needs any help," Emma changed up her pile of wood and struck another match as she frowned at the difficulty of lighting it.

"You're helping me right now. If she is so set on running this town, let her find her own way to manage things," Regina held her head up, looking longingly over at the Story book on her desk.

Emma's eyes tracked Regina's gaze, "What are you thinking about?"

"Nothing," Regina insisted.

"If it's about your happy ending, I just want to remind you these things don't happen overnight. Besides if you're looking for some grand romantic gesture and for some dude to just swoop in out of nowhere and treat you like a Queen then I think you better lower your expectations," Emma busied herself at the fire, crinkling up some paper lying nearby and trying to start that.

"I don't need grand romantic gestures…I wouldn't even know where to begin. I just want something simple, yet exciting in a relationship," Regina watched with a smirk and an air of amusement as Emma cursed the fireplace.

"Ugh, do you have any lighter fluid, gasoline, kerosene… or paint thinner? I need something more flammable to get this going," Emma bumped her head on the top of the fireplace causing soot to fall from the chimney.

"Ouch. Anyways, back to what I was saying. A perfect relationship isn't all about romance. Romance just doesn't last forever. I mean it's important to continue to date and stuff, but it's more about finding balance in a true partner. Like maybe one person never does the laundry or cooks dinner, but they do all the yard work and get up with the kids at the ass crack of dawn every day. Now you could complain about those things that they don't do, or you could just appreciate the things that they do, do."

The fire crackled as Emma nursed the tiny embers to life, holding her palms around the scrap of newspaper as she blew on it just so to get it started. Slowly, the fire crept to life and overtook the splintered pieces of light kindling and the bigger logs started burning.

Regina sat in silence watching and contemplating Emma's words, "Maybe I would pick a partner who compliments me, rather than everything similar to my interests."

"Exactly," Emma concurred, standing up and reaching out to feel the first nod of heat from the mighty fire she had tirelessly built. She turned to Regina for approval on a job well done.

"Just bring me the book, please," Regina's hand darted out from under the covers and she pointed at the book, snapping her fingers out of force of habit.

"I'm getting it. 'Build a fire, Emma,' 'bring me the book, Emma,'" she mocked as she wiped her hands on the back of her jeans and grabbed the book from the desk. She plopped down next to Regina and held it out to her as if she was serving a fine dinner. "Here ya go."

"You know what I realized? I've never actually really read the stories. Well, except the ones about me, but mainly I've just skimmed over it and looked at the pictures," the brunette admitted, automatically taking the book from Emma's hands and allowing the blonde to sneak her cold feet under the edge of the blanket.

"We already know all of these stories," Emma commented as she held half of the book, looking at the pages alongside Regina as she flipped through it.

"Yes, we know the version the book tells us. The book wants you to think it's being objective and fair, but I know better. I have firsthand knowledge of some of these events and the writers of the book do not paint a wholly accurate picture."

"So what do you want to do? Rewrite the already written stories now?"

"No, there's no point in doing that…I just need to get a feel for how the book is written so I can mimic the style while I write my own into the blank pages in the back," she flipped to the last story of the book and then to where the blank pages had been yesterday surprised to find a new story in the book.

"What's that?" Emma noticed it too, and leaned closer to Regina to take a look.

"I don't know. It wasn't here yesterday," Regina turned to the next page and her eyes widened.

"Is that-is that us?"


	4. put it to the test

"Let me see that!" Regina leaned forward taking the book from Emma's hands and staring at the new illustration on the page. It depicted Regina fumbling with chopsticks and glaring at a fried chunk of chicken, while Emma watched amused next to her. They were both under the blanket and light from the fire and the open lap top screen reflected on their faces.

"That's not a very flattering drawing of you, but at least whoever drew me made my arms look toned," Emma leaned over and pointed at her sweater clad arms.

"This is alarming. Why would this appear in the book? Someone is watching us!" Regina slammed it shut and lifted it to throw it across the room. Emma yanked it out of her hand just before she whipped it forward.

Regina huffed in frustrated annoyance and quickly crossed her arms across her chest pursing her lips as she looked around the room in a fit of paranoia. Emma calmly reopened the book and started to read the new story about them. She looked up after a moment and asked, "Do you really feel safe with me?"

Eyes widening, Regina scooted closer and peered over Emma's shoulder, "Where does it say that?"

"Right here," Emma pointed to the line and began to read, "The Queen roused from sleep in the dead of night finding herself curled against the Savior. Her first instinct was to pull away, but she realized how safe and warm she felt nestled in the Savior's embrace and let herself fall asleep once more, pulling the other woman closer."

"How the hell did it know that?" Regina was full on alarmed and if not more than a bit embarrassed. Her thoughts were her own and private. "That cursed book is obviously taking creative liberties."

"Yeah, like the part where it says we cuddled all night and into the morning," the blonde recited, pausing for a moment to look at the angry woman next to her.

"We didn't cuddle, that's preposterous. It has it all wrong," Regina insisted flipping to the next page and trying to quickly scan the text for what came next in the story. She cocked her head and paused, "We may have huddled together, but only for warmth. It can't be twisting the facts. Give it here."

Ripping it out of Emma's hands, Regina calmed down for a moment and continued to read the untitled story. After another minute of reading she sat it down and stared pointedly at Emma. Slowly, her lip turned up as she tried to reconcile what she had just read, and form it into a question, "Emma, are you attracted to me?"

"Huh?" Emma's cheeks turned red as a blush quickly overtook her. "Where does it say that?"

Regina cleared her throat and quoted the book, "the Savior pushed untoward thoughts about the Queen from her mind, but couldn't help become gently aroused by the close proximity of the brunette and her soft restful breaths wafting against her neck. She decided to wake the Queen before she let her mind drift farther into the realm of eroticism."

"Really? Realm of eroticism? The book is definitely taking liberties…I wouldn't call them all that creative," Emma's posture stiffened as she tried to process what it all meant. She came up for a loss and looked to Regina to have the answers. Emma knew that indeed she had been gently aroused by Regina, but she sure as hell didn't want her to know. It made her wonder if that was true then was the part about Regina finding Emma's embrace safe and comforting also true?

"Our story doesn't have an ending," Regina proclaimed about ready to tear her hair out. It wasn't enough that the book was hemorrhaging her secrets, but it wasn't even doing any of the work, just retelling it's version of their reality.

If they were going to get to the bottom of this they needed a plan of attack, "We have to test this and see if we control this story or if it's controlling us."

"And how exactly do you propose we do that? Do you realize that the book called our evening of dinner and movie last night a date? That was not a date. No one said it was a date."

"Yeah, we're clear on that…it wasn't a date, obviously." Emma shrugged, trying to edge the disappointment out of her voice. She didn't expect that it was a date, but the fact that Regina was so adamant to thwart it felt like rejection on some level. "I mean sheesh, if it was a date I wouldn't have been trying to help you find your true love."

"That's all we were trying to do and the sneaky book perverted it," Regina nodded, her brow furrowed as her thoughts raced. Why would the book show a different perspective of their night together that was so clearly distorted?

"So we should have another date together and see what the book writes about it. We'll plan out all the details and stick to them and then if the book adds in our thoughts and opinions we'll know that it's an unreliable source."

"Yes, and more importantly, we'll also know that we are in control of what we do and not the stupid book. And why would you and I be in the book together? Eating Chinese takeout and watching a romantic comedy is hardly a fairytale," Regina pondered as Emma looked around the room, pulling the blanket closer around her once more.

"Shall we plan our next date for tonight?" Emma interjected, trying to change the subject and unwilling to point out that takeout, movies and cuddling was the most perfect fairytale date she could ever want. She worried about the pressing matter of what they should do on their next date to trick the book. She tried to tell herself it was all a big coincidence and just one of the many factors of living in a town with magic and fairytale characters there was bound to be some overkill on the whole happily ever after with a true love trope.

"I suppose it's best if we do it the sooner the better, but we're somewhat limited on what to do if the town stays without power," Regina acknowledged trying to think of something that would trip up the book. As they thought about potential date ideas the lights flickered on as the power was restored.

"Hmm, Mary Margaret must have fixed it."

"That's surprisingly convenient," Regina agreed as her eyes narrowed and she glared at the brown leather bound book as if it was personally mocking her. In the blink of an eye she had a sort of vision of holding Emma's hand and ice skating around the pond at the park while Henry sped by. She could almost taste the warm spiced cider in her thermos and smell the cocoa and cinnamon that Emma and Henry would share jointly.

Absently, she spoke unable to shake the idea, "Maybe we should go ice skating and bring Henry. It would be something festive to make the most of this cold snap."

"Yeah, that sounds nice, something active to do," Emma was pleasantly surprised by Regina's suggestion as she figured she'd want to go out to a fancy restaurant and do something traditional. It would be fun to include Henry. She wondered if the book would include him in the story; assuming that the book actually wrote anything at all. "Oh, Regina, just promise me that we can go get cocoa afterwards?"

"Um, of course…I was planning on bringing cocoa and cider for us," it wasn't that strange that Emma would suggest cocoa, as it made perfect sense, but Regina wanted to make something clear for the sake of the experiment, "Emma, if we do this we have to be very open about our intentions and our feelings. Can you promise me that you will be?"

"I'm an open book," Emma joked and Regina rolled her eyes. "No, I get it. We have to see if the book makes anything up about us."

"That is correct. So if I confess something, will you swear to tell me the truth?" Regina lowered her tone, she felt butterflies flutter in her stomach, and her throat went dry.

"I promise, as I said I am just as involved in this as you are," Emma nodded leaning in.

Regina took a moment to collect her thoughts, her lips parting silently as her eyes flitted back and forth. Finally she spoke, "the book was right…I did feel safe with you…last night, but it's only because you're the Savior and you give off the very essence of safety," she cut herself off before more excuses tumbled out of her mouth. It was becoming of her to justify her confessions. She didn't meet Emma's eyes as she asked, "Now you tell me: was the book right about what it said you felt?"

Emma faltered for a moment, but found her confidence. She had promised to be honest. Sheepishly she admitted it, "You're a very beautiful woman. I might be a little bit attracted to you. I don't know."

Regina wet her lips and tried to think. She didn't know how to feel about Emma's confession. It didn't make her uncomfortable. If anything, it made her feel incredibly curious. Then there was the matter that perhaps the book wasn't making things up. Regina regained her composure as Emma implored her with a look. Despite the cold room, she seemed to be sweating in nervousness.

"Regina?"

"No, everything is going to be fine. Tonight we will test…everything."


	5. Nachos of destiny

"I think we have everything. Is everyone familiar with the itinerary for our evening?" Regina looked between Emma and Henry, who were bundled up in so many outer clothes they could barely nod. She then her planned list of activities, and reviewed them using a voice that made her sound like a school teacher addressing a group of children on a field trip.

"We begin our trek at Silbury Hill, in which Henry will try not to damage himself on that horrible sled that Marco constructed. That will be from 4:30-5:15pm. Following that, we will arrive at the frozen pond and commence with skating between 5:30 and 6:00pm. When we finish with skating, I have prepared cocoa and the big pretzels that Henry enjoys…"

Henry started to interrupt and Regina put up a hand, "Yes, I brought that hideous yellow cheese you like."

"Awesome! Not that I'm complaining, but it's kind of strange that we're all going out to have fun. Does this have something to do with Operation Mongoose?" Henry asked quizzing his mother's who both were sporting matching guilty looks.

"Should we tell him?" Emma looked to Regina and she paused to think about it.

"Tell me what?" Henry implored. Now that he knew something was going on, he would never let up about it until they told him.

"Yes, Henry. This is an experiment we're trying to trick the book, or at least see what happens with it," Regina admitted, tugging on the zipper of Henry's coat, and winding his scarf securely around his neck.

"Did something happen with the book? Are there new stories? Let me see it," Henry's eye widened in excitement.

"Um…I don't think you need to see it, but there is a new story and it's about your mom and me," Emma looked a bit embarrassed as she caught Regina's eye. She took a breath, "It's no big deal. We just want to try a night out and see if the book writes anything else about us."

"That is so cool! I want to read it. Mom, come on. Operation Mongoose is our thing; maybe I can help."

"Henry, you may be too young to understand…" Regina continued to look at Emma, playing off the other woman's reactions to decided how much to reveal to Henry.

"Regina, he should know what we're doing. He's got to be in on it too, otherwise how can we be sure our experiment actually works?" Emma adjusted her stocking cap and slid her mitten covered hands into the pockets of her coat. She was starting to sweat and if they were to keep to Regina's precise schedule they needed to get a move on.

"Yeah, let me read the book!" Henry demanded.

"No, it's…the story the book wrote about Emma and I, it's inappropriate," Regina scrunched her face, that wasn't the exact word she wanted to use, but she couldn't bear the thought of Henry finding out that book thought that his mothers cuddled together and that there might be a slim hint of attraction between them.

"How can it be inappropriate, it's a book of fairytales?"

Regina mostly enjoyed and encouraged Henry's inquisitive nature, but in this case it was starting to become a hindrance.

"Hey, Maleficent contained a rape scene and that was a Disney movie," Emma shrugged and pursed her lips.

"Maleficent didn't show a rape scene. What are you talking about?" Regina scoffed, "and I hardly think the book showing us as on a date constitutes the comparison."

"The dude drugged her and cut off her wings. It was a metaphor," Emma answered in an obvious tone.

"Wait a second!" Henry's sharp little ears had picked up on the truth of the matter, "the book thinks you two are dating?"

"Henry, that book is a liar, and we're intending to set it straight tonight," Regina stomped her foot; her eyes gleaming, she hoisted the bag of snacks and beverages over her shoulder and headed towards the door. "Shall we go now?"

Emma picked up their ice skates and followed after Regina. She had secretly been looking forward to their outing all day and she was anxious to get out on the ice and have some fun. It would be nice to just spend some time not worrying about the book or existential happy endings for a night.

"I think I see what's going on here," Henry remained stationary in the foyer, making no effort to move. He crossed his arms over his puffy coat; his expression was a perfect Regina-esque imitation. "You two are trying to prove the book wrong by going on another date, right?"

"Yes, Henry, but it's fake. We're just pretending to go on a date to see what the book says, and that way we can see how much it really knows and get to the bottom of things," Regina explained, her patience was wearing thin.

Emma saw Henry's face fall and quickly stepped in, "But just because it's a fake date, it doesn't mean that we're not looking forward to sledding and skating with you. The fun will be real, I promise."

"Okay, so this fake date is like phase two of Operation Mongoose, so I think we need a new name for it," Henry's thoughts raced as he tried to quickly come up with a new name.

"If you must," Regina huffed, and slid the heavy bag off her shoulder.

"I got it!" Henry bounced on his heels and smirked widely, his eyes squinting, "Mission Fate: a mash up of fake date."

"Really? Fate? I'm gonna go start the car," Emma rolled her eyes and headed out the door. She found it exhausting trying to keep her thoughts neutral. She feared the book had some omniscient power and she would hate to read her any of her more embarrassing thoughts when they materialized within the pages. It must be what it would be like to be a celebrity and read untrue nasty rumors about you in a gossip magazine. Even if the rumors were true she still didn't want anyone reading about her business. She cleared the tiny backseat of the bug and popped the trunk to wedge the ice skates next to the Henry's fancy sled that was already inside.

A moment later Regina and Henry emerged from the house and they were off: riding out to the sledding hill while Regina rattled off safety tips, "You can't wear your scarf, it may become tangled on the sled and strangle you. You can't do down face first or backwards as those positions result in the most head traumas. Only sled in snow and beware of ice."

"Mom, I got it. I'll be fine. Emma's gonna sled with me," Henry was excited, but also a bit scared from all the safety talk. He'd never been sledding before.

"Emma, do you need a safety lecture as well?" Regina quirked an eyebrow and Emma reached over and patted her knee.

"Please, I'm an expert at sledding. One time, I think I was a bit younger than Henry; I took a lunch tray from the elementary school cafeteria and greased it up with Crisco. Then I climbed up a mountain. It was pure ice and super slick, and when I got to the top I sat my butt down and flew like a bolt of lightning. Halfway down I fell off and rolled the rest of the way."

"Awesome!" Henry yelled from the back seat.

"It was awesome!" Emma agreed.

"You're lucky to be alive, dear," Regina placed her hands in her lap and looked out as they pulled up the driveway leading to the big hill. As soon as they parked, Emma grabbed the sled and Henry dragged it to the top of the hill. Regina yelled at him to take off his scarf, but he couldn't hear her so she had to make a gesture like she was strangling. Emma hiked up after finding the whole scenario overly amusing.

There were well worn treads in the snowy hill, and the sun was just setting. Luckily, despite the brisk temperature there was no wind to add a chill. Regina watched from the bottom of the hill, wringing her hands together with nerves as Henry and Emma climbed onto the sled.

"Ready, kid?" Emma asked as she pushed off while Henry steered, they flew down the hill, screaming and whooping until they finally slid to a stop.

"I want to go by myself this time," Henry called breathlessly as Emma picked herself up from the snow and walked over to Regina. They watched Henry haul the sled up the hill again and slide down whooshing past.

"We didn't die, you can lighten up a bit," Emma teased, sensing how tense Regina seemed. She placed her hand around Regina's shoulder in a show of solidarity, "I know its scary watching him and not knowing if he'd going to get hurt, but really he will be okay."

Regina gave her a side glance, "You can't be certain of that."

"No, seriously, it's totally safe," Emma argued, and Regina couldn't help but be overcome by the feeling she always had when she was around the Savior. She felt herself become calm and she believed her.

"Let me take you down the hill," Emma tugged gently on Regina's arm to try and get her in motion.

"I'm not sure about that. I didn't wear a snow suit," her only argument against it was her apparel and it sounded weak even to her.

"Come on, we're supposed to be on a date and that means we have to be together doing things," Emma whispered to Regina, despite Henry being far out of earshot. He had already dashed past them on the hill and was on his way down again.

"That's what a date is? Being together and doing things?" Regina let out a throaty chuckle.

"Well, there's maybe a bit more to it, but yeah, we've been over this. It's just spending time with someone who wants to spend time with you," Emma said as she picked up her pace and flagged Henry down to commandeer the sled as he brought it up the hill.

"You're going down with Mom?" Henry saw Regina standing at the top of the hill and grinned. "This I have to see!"

Emma found the perfect spot at the highest point on the hill and dusted the snow off so it was clean for the Queen's royal ass. Regina stared at the sled with hesitation and a bit of contempt until Emma prompted her sit down. She did carefully, tucking her coat in and holding the rope that was supposed to guide the direction of the sled.

"Why do I have to be in front?"

"So I can use you as a shield," Emma hopped on behind her, extending her legs on either side of Regina's and wrapped her arms firmly around waist. Emma gave a heave to get the ball rolling and gravity did the rest. They swooped down the hill Emma laughed and held Regina tightly, as she dropped the rope and grabbed Emma's thighs. The wind whipped their hair as they careened down the hill. They finally stopped as a cloud of snow blew over them. Regina's nails were still digging into Emma's thighs, and that feeling was back. The one she had tried to quell when they were tangled up together on the couch. She felt a tingle shoot from where Regina's leather gloved hands were stroking her legs that landed centrally between her jeans clad thighs.

As they gathered their wits and recovered from the fast, but short ride, Regina leaned back, her body pressed flushed against Emma's chest, as she held her close. The brunette tilted her head and looked up to meet Emma's eyes as they smiled at each other, and Emma reached up to brush snowflakes from Regina's hair. There was that wonderful, albeit infuriating feeling again. Without fail, whenever Emma touched her it was like a soothing caress. Regina didn't have the wherewithal to fight it, not now; she just sunk into the feeling like she was floating on water.

"That was like a very brief horseback ride, though I suppose a bit more exhilarating," Regina finally noticed that she was holding Emma's legs and let go reluctantly. She scooted forward while Emma hopped off and offered her hand to help the brunette up. She pulled her up easily and they brushed each other off and laughed heartily, getting caught up in the moment.

"Can I have a pretzel yet?" Henry's voice broke their reverie as he whined from the sidelines feeling left out.

"I thought you were going to start a snowball fight?" Emma answered as she and Regina walked back toward the car, towing the sled behind them.

"Eh, maybe later, I want a pretzel and I know we're behind schedule, but Mom, can I stay and sled some more while you and Emma go ice skating? I'll be really careful and you'll be able to see me from the skating pond to make sure I'm still alive."

Regina nodded, agreeing that the plan was permissible as long he didn't try to do anything risky like stand up on the sled while it was moving. Henry promised and dug into the pack of pretzels, Regina reheated the pretzel with a touch of magic and handed one to Emma, along with the tasty cheese dip as they all leaned against the hood of the bug.

Between mouthfuls of chewy, buttery, salty bread, Emma gasped, "These are amazing!"

"I know, I told you that Mom makes the best," Henry scarfed his down, eager to get back to sledding, as he mopped up every last bit of cheese dip with his last bite of pretzel.

Regina sipped her cider quietly, warming her hands on the thermos.

Emma noticed and asked, "Are you cold?"

"Not bad, but maybe we could sit in the car and warm up for a bit before we skate?"

They got into the car and Emma turned it on, cranking the heat, and watching her breath curl into little swirls of steam. "I was thinking about choices. Why can't we just simply choose to be happy no matter what? Have you ever gotten a bad meal at a restaurant?"

"What does a bad dining experience have to do with my happiness?" Regina took the bait.

"This one time I ordered these nachos at a Mexican restaurant, and they were kind of burned and there was barely any cheese and the meat was all greasy and made them soggy. I really love nachos, and these were terrible, and it was all I could focus on. I was supposed to be having a good time out with some friends back in Boston, but I let the shitty nachos ruin the whole night. I ended up yelling at the waiter, and it wasn't even his fault that the nachos were bad."

"I hope you never again darkened the door of that establishment. If a Mexican restaurant can't make nachos I shudder to think what the rest of their food quality was like," Regina was surprisingly sympathetic to Emma's plight with the nachos.

"No, I didn't go back there, but it made me think about things. I hated that I let those stupid soggy have so much control over my thoughts and feelings. The next time I ordered food and it wasn't good, I didn't yell. I was just polite about it, and they brought me something else to eat and I carried on as if it hadn't even happened. It's like I realized that no one else has the power to decide how you will react to something. We always have a choice."

"Like we have the power right now to decide how this night plays out," Regina said quietly as she looked at Emma and waved her hand like she was about to do magic. Emma took a deep breath and remembered how nice those fingers felt on her thighs. She pushed the memory away, afraid to think about it. She'd worry about it later.

"What do you think the book is going to say about Mission Fate?"

Regina looked out the window, chastising herself for having feelings and thoughts about Emma. She told herself that she was in control and the book wasn't going to decide her destiny. She took another sip of her drink, and answered the question uncertainly, "I don't know."


	6. Into the Spin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: My apologies for all the typos and mistakes in this story. I am racing the clock to meet my word count for NANOWRIMO, but at least I'm updating very quickly. Thank you all for the lovely reviews, I didn't think this was going to be a long story, but it's very enjoyable to write so why not stretch it out a bit? 
> 
> "So here we go back again. Slow climb, but quick to descend. Arms out, arms out. Turn into the spin. It's lovely and brief with just gravity and me." - Dessa

"I have to admit that I'm not the best ice skater, I have great hand eye coordination, but my foot eye is not so hot," Emma sat on a log as she laced up her skates. They were ready to get out there and attack the ice. Regina finished tying up her own skates and pushed off to stand and wait for Emma.

Regina looked toward the big hill, checking to make sure Henry wasn't lying unconscious at the bottom. She looked just in time to see him whoosh down on the sled, and she marveled at his boundless energy. She turned her attention the woman before her, who was struggling to simply stand up, as her feet wobbled beneath her.

They had mutually agreed to not worry about the book or fate or anything regarding the matter for the rest of the evening and simply let things play out. Sufficiently warm and bundled up, they went out onto the ice. Though, Regina had assumed Emma to be slightly more competent at skating than she seemed to be despite her warning.

Without thinking, Regina took Emma's hand, steadying her. She came around to her side and helped her to slowly glide (or rather clomp) out onto the smooth ice. The sun was down and the air was still and cold, the trees surrounding the frozen pond, sparkled in the fresh moonlight; the ice as shiny as a mirror.

"I can do totally do this," Emma let go of Regina's hand and pushed herself forward, teetering and flailing immediately. She found Regina's hand once again like a life line and stood still in her clutches.

"At this rate we're not going to get anywhere," Regina tried to sound annoyed, but at best she was bemused. She relished any chance to go into teacher mode and Emma seemed to be a clumsy yet willing student. "You're not walking over the ice: you glide."

In demonstration and with exaggerated motion Regina slid out on her blades, carving perfect straight lines into the ice. She kept a firm hold on Emma, who was concentrating intensely. Within minutes she was sweating under her thick outer clothes, but making great strides with the brunette's assistance.

"Are we having fun yet?" Emma muttered glibly, as Regina let go and skated circles around her.

"A little faster, you're getting the hang of it," she encouraged, watching proudly as Emma sped up without faltering or losing her balance.

"I'm so going to be ready for cocoa after this," Emma heaved in breaths, still unable to trust that she wouldn't fall, but she was quickly acclimating to the new sensation and starting to hold her own. She caught up to Regina, skating past her, unable to stop. "Okay, I'm ready."

"Ready for what?" Regina skated up next to her and furrowed her brow in question.

In answer, Emma snatched her hand and dug her skates deep into the ice, pushing off hard to propel them forward, "This!"

Regina quickly caught on as they alternated pulling each other around the large pond, gaining speed and with each lap. They laughed freely, between breaths, their hearts pumping as they tried to outdo each other in friendly competition. She felt carefree and invincible; it was an incredible rush.

Fighting exhaustion Regina finally slowed down, pulling Emma into her and spinning them in a circle to decrease their momentum. Emma slipped and Regina caught her, wrapping her arms around waist and pulling her close for stabilization. Their eyes locked together in surprise, and their breath mingled as they stood under the moonlight in the middle of frozen pond. Emma's heart was beating wildly, and she tried to tell herself the surge of adrenaline was from skating, but she felt that slow burning heat, coiling in the pit of her stomach. Her attention shifted from Regina's eyes to her mouth, where she was slowly running her tongue over her bottom lip. It was mesmerizing.

Regina's brain was telling her to push away, and gain some distance between them. Emma was no longer in danger of falling, and there was no need to hang onto her and hold her so close. Except for her sudden and insistent need to study the blonde's face: her eyes were shining and glossy, her cheeks were rosy and she looked downright adorable in her oversized hat. Her lips looked inviting, and for a moment Regina found herself wondering what it would feel like to press her own against Emma's and hold them there. Time seemed to expand and she felt light headed as they stayed locked in each other's arms on the ice.

Henry broke their reverie by coming onto the ice, letting out a holler and skating past a bit too haphazardly for Regina's liking. She broke the silence, "Henry, slow down."

Emma pulled herself away from Regina as if she had just been caught with her hand in the cookie jar, "I'm just going to do another lap with Henry."

"I'll go prepare your cocoa," Regina blushed fiercely and tried to hide it by turning away and skating back to the edge. She silently prayed that the book wouldn't choose to highlight that interaction that had left her feeling particularly flustered and queer. She chased the thoughts away, by focusing on the task at hand. She mindfully stirred and heated cocoa, added whipped cream and a dash of cinnamon for Henry and Emma.

"Oh Shit!"

"Mom, Emma's hurt!"

Regina whipped around, looking frantically across the pond to see Emma lying on her back on the ice. She could hear her groaning and cursing in pain. Henry was standing over her, looking at her leg. Regina hit the ice, and skated as fast she could over to her family.

"What happened?" Regina loomed over her, kneeling down to check her head for signs of trauma.

"My ankle," Emma moaned; her face was constricted in pain, and her uninjured leg was moving limply as she tried to sit up and survey the damage.

"Don't move," Regina insisted, she carefully loosened the laces on Emma's left skate and Emma gritted her teeth as searing pain tore her ankle. Regina carefully pulled off her skate.

"It doesn't look that bad," Henry tried to comfort Emma by holding her hand.

Then Regina peeled back her sock and rolled up her pant leg; the ankle was already angry looking with black and blue streaks encompassed by a rapidly swelling ankle.

"Oh, I take that back," Henry said downtrodden. Emma struggled to sit up and with Henry's help she looked down at her severely sprained ankle.

"We'll get you off the ice," Regina said decidedly, "Henry, you take her right side and we'll carry her back to the car."

"I can hop, you don't have to carry me," Emma insisted stubbornly.

"Really? You are going to hop on one skate all the way across the ice and up the hill," Regina didn't mean to sound flippant, but it seemed quite obvious that Emma wasn't going anywhere without help.

The blonde sighed wearily and closed her eyes as she resigned herself to the fact that she needed help. Regina and Henry lifted her and she wrapped her arms over their shoulders. It took a bit of coordination and a lot of maneuvering, but they managed to get her to the car and into the passenger seat. Regina unlaced her other skate and slid it off. While Henry packed up the sled and took Emma her cup of cocoa, which she gratefully accepted.

"The worst part of this is that I'm not going to be able to go to work until I can walk again," Emma pouted, thinking about the back log of paperwork she was going to be forced to complete. Sitting at her desk was her worst nightmare.

"The worst part of this is that I have to drive your ridiculous car home," Regina grumbled as she slammed the driver's side door and ignited the engine.

"Can't you help her ankle with magic, Mom?" Henry asked from the back seat as he warmed himself with his own cup of cocoa.

"Yes, but not right away. The swelling will need to go down so I can heal it properly," Regina nodded curtly as she hit the break a little too hard in the foreign car and Emma cringed as her ankle moved sharply. "Sorry, I'm not used to this car. If you accept I can take you home with me and you can recover on my sofa, and I'll work on healing your ankle with magic."

Made hopeful by the prospect that Regina could fix her ankle in no time, Emma was quick to agree, "I promise I will be a good patient."

…

That was a promise that she didn't exactly keep.

Once Emma was properly situated on the couch, she immediately requested a fluffier pillow for her head and two additional pillows to prop up her foot. Then her stomach grumbled, and Henry brought her another pretzel, which he made sure to heat for exactly 15 seconds in the microwave, along with another cup of cheese dip, naturally. Then she was thirsty and needed water and ibuprofen, which Henry brought to her and helped her sip through a straw so she could swallow her pain pills.

When she finished drinking she touched Henry's cheek and said, "This is how it's going to be when I get old and frail. You'll have to take care of both of your moms."

"Can't wait," Henry let his shoulders slump forward and asked through a yawn, "Is there anything else you need before I go upstairs?"

"Henry, go ahead and get ready for bed. I'll take of care of her. You've done a very good job," Regina sat at the end of the couch holding a bag of ice to the injury, and flipping it whenever it felt too cold for Emma's liking.

"Thanks, kid," Emma said meekly, patting his arm as he left the room. She directed her attention to Regina, "So I didn't expect to end up on your couch for a second night in a row."

"I should have given you a longer safety lecture. You must have been engaging of some form of high risk activity to have created such a horrendous injury."

"Nope, it was just good old fashioned klutziness. I'm hot. Can you help me take off a couple of these layers?" Emma unzipped her coat and tried to shimmy out of it.

"Stay still. Just wait a moment," Regina helped slip each arm free from the overly thick coat, pulling it out from under her back.

"Still hot, can you help me with this sweater, please?" Emma scratched at the thick woolly sweater where it was causing her neck to itch.

"Yesterday, we were freezing," Regina gave her a look that denoted she was very aware that she was going above and beyond the call of duty and leaned over to tug on the hem of her sweater. Emma pulled herself to a half sitting position and Regina guided the sweater up her back and pulled it over her head and arms.

The white tank she wore underneath clung to the sweater via static and rode up her torso, exposing her bare stomach. Regina caught herself staring a moment too late.

"What is it? Is there a bruise?" Emma pulled her shirt up even higher flexing her abs as she examined her defined oblique muscles.

"Nothing, no…I wasn't looking at anything," Regina bit her lip in worry, as she mentally chided herself for staring. She didn't know what was coming over her. "Dear, erm, Emma, I think we've had quite a long day and I should leave you to get some rest. I'll be able to heal your ankle in the morning."

Emma pulled her shirt down and smoothed her hands over her stomach, and that's when Regina noticed her arm muscles. The book hadn't even really done her cut biceps justice. She quickly diverted her eyes, pointing them back to the mangled ankle; perhaps that would distract her to more appropriate thoughts.

"Um, aren't you going to…you know?" Emma looked supremely shy and embarrassed.

"What?" Regina bent down in concern.

"Stay with me?"


	7. Adorable

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "If you're asking, I can't say no. Just one more chapter, our book won't close. And I know it's madness to play these odds. It's like giving matches to paper dolls." ~Dessa

A panicked rush of emotion invaded Regina's body and her mind whirred as she looked at Emma, thinking. Then she tried not to think, that damn book was going to have a field day with this decision. Emma was just lying on the couch looking so hopeful and so inviting. Her mouth practically watered as she felt the temptation to ease in next to Emma and allow herself to be surrounded by that tantalizing sense of security she freely offered. It was aggravating, and Regina automatically started making justifications and rationalizations in her head for how it was entirely necessary that she cuddle up for a second night in a row.

Emma let her head roll back and she closed her eyes, wearing a slightly pained expression, "You're thinking about what the book will say, aren't you?"

Regina couldn't deny it, "I just don't want a false story to appear. Last night, I simply fell asleep on you, and it was so cold we could have suffered from hypothermia, but tonight… the heat is functioning sufficiently and I'm not about to accidentally nod off, so there's really no conceivable reason for me to sleep here."

Emma detected a hint of disappointment in Regina's tone and opened her mouth to argue, but stopped before saying what was on her mind. She almost said that Regina could crawl in next to her and they could cuddle together because they simply wanted to, but she honestly wasn't sure what Regina was feeling. Maybe she didn't want that at all and Emma was suddenly struck by the thought that she was being very presumptuous asking.

Perhaps she was trying to gently let Emma down by blaming the book for her rationale. Regina had a big comfortable bed upstairs that she could have all to herself, it was dumb to think that she would want to be crammed onto the much narrower couch all night and share it with another person. She just couldn't shake the feeling that their date wasn't all that false, but maybe Regina was a better actress than she was.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have assumed anything. You've already done so much for me tonight and I don't want to bother you anymore," Emma covered her eyes with her forearm and bit her lip.

Regina sighed, looking at the clock and then her eyes darted to the drawer of her desk where she kept the book locked in. Her cheeks heated and she wrung her hands together, trying to think of a response that would sound neutral. "Is there anything else you need before I go upstairs?"

Emma's eyes popped open, the pain in her ankle had dulled and was now just an annoying ever present ache. She noticed how nervous Regina looked, "Do you want to read the book now and see if it chronicled our…date?"

"I do," Regina looked at her hands; she rocked on her heels, feeling uncomfortable hovering over Emma. She hated feeling like she wanted to see what it said, but she was also dreading it. She tried to think about the sequence of events of the evening and prepare herself, but it proved too daunting, "but I think we should wait until the morning."

"Yeah, that's probably best," Emma winced and asked softly, "Can you help me make it to the bathroom before you go to bed?"

"I suppose," Regina agreed relieved to have something to do that delayed their parting. She helped Emma swing her leg down and sit up. Then she stood in front of her, helping her balance and pulling her up. Emma flung her arm over Regina's shoulders and they hopped slowly down the hall to the bathroom door, "I trust you can take it from here?"

"Maybe," Emma joked as she disappeared inside. Trying to shimmy her tight skinny jeans down her legs while trying not to fall or put pressure on her foot was more of a challenge then she anticipated, but she managed. She splashed some water on her face and looked in the mirror. Why did she feel so disappointed?

They made their way back to the sofa and Emma sat back down, while Regina situated her foot. She unfolded a blanket and spread it over her. She smiled and crossed the room to turn out the light, and her heart felt heavy and deprived.

"Good night, Emma."

"Goodnight," an overwhelming sense that this is not how their night was supposed to end hit her like a Mack truck. A vision enveloped her mind's eye of Regina cautiously slipping in next to her and Emma wrapping her arms around her, accompanied by a blissful feeling that evaporated as quickly as it overcame her. "Regina, wait!"

"What is it?" Regina rushed back to her side in the darkness, just making out Emma's silhouette as she sat up. She then took a fumbling step backwards, embarrassed by how quickly she responded as if she was desperate for any reason to stay.

"Um, what if I have to go pee again? Or I fall off the couch and can't get up, or I need some water or more ibuprofen?"

"Oh…"

"What if I need you?"

The question soothed the brunette's mind, and she smiled in the darkness, and directed her voice toward the desk as if the book was listening to their conversation, "Those are valid concerns…I should probably stay and prevent you from maiming yourself further during the night."

Emma nodded emphatically, scooting over to make room and holding back the blanket. She added a bit louder than necessary, "I have a weak bladder."

Regina cautiously slipped in next to her, easing under the blanket, and Emma wrapped her arms around her like a koala clinging to a branch of Eucalyptus. Her nose pushed into Regina's hair and she thought about how earthy and fresh she smelled as a blissful feeling encompassed her. It took Regina a moment to release her mind and let her body relax. Her heart was pounding as if she shouldn't be doing this, but her need to be near Emma was rapidly becoming some sort of addiction.

"Are you okay?" Emma murmured softly, letting her lips lightly brush Regina's scalp, which sent a thrilling shiver down Regina's back.

"I'm fine now," Regina answered, feeling herself drifting closer to sleep. She absently patted Emma's bare arm, and left her palm to linger there, running up and down the nicely toned expanse of shoulder muscles and triceps. Emma felt the caress, but didn't say anything to call attention to it, in the same way that Regina didn't say anything about Emma sniffing her hair.

The night passed without incident, and both women slept soundly and Regina awoke in the morning knowing she had been dreaming, but she couldn't remember what about. Her body apparently remembered the dream as she felt aroused. As she stretched lightly and regained her wits she discovered both her hands were trapped under Emma's tank top touching her stomach. The blonde's hands were still wrapped around her, but instead of loosely encircling her back, they had drifted south and she felt them firmly holding her butt. She heard Emma moan softly in her sleep and a pleasant pang of arousal tickled her nerve endings.

Fully awake, a new feeling rose in her belly: fear. She untangled herself from Emma; slowly sliding her hands down Emma's stomach and then reaching back to pry the woman's hands off of her ass. She pulled back the blanket and broke free of their cuddle cocoon. It felt like a shock to the system to pull away, but she shook off the almost physically painful feeling at the loss of contact and busied her mind by checking Emma's ankle. The swelling appeared to have subsided. She stole a glance at Emma who now looked discontent and restless in sleep.

Emma had been having the best dream, and then it ended. She had been with Regina, she was certain of that much, but then she disappeared. Emma was frantically searching snow covered fields looking for her. She started to wake up in frustration, angry that her search was cut short. Then another sensation started to come over her.

Regina circled her hand over the injury and concentrated on healing it, a golden stream of light floated from Regina's hand and was absorbed by Emma's ankle effectively healing it. Emma felt a warm tingle imbued with an intense sexual vibe spread from her ankle and up through her whole body.

Her eyes popped open and she looked at her foot, flexing it and rolling it without pain. The blanket fell from Emma's shoulders down to her lap and Regina's eyes focused on Emma's chest, specifically the hardened peaks of her nipples pushing in relief against her tight tank top. Regina swallowed and blinked rapidly, licking her lips and forcing a smile. "All better."

"Yeah, mmm," Emma moaned breathily, "You fixed my ankle…" She tried to rid herself of the coursing tendrils of lust spreading through her limbs and focus on reality.

"Tell me again why you couldn't use magic to fix it last night?" Emma yawned and lifted her arms to stretch, drawing Regina's gaze to her enticing torso and the lovely curves of her chest.

"Um…hmm?" Regina stuttered, remembering the question with a bit of a delay, "Oh, well, magic has very specific and peculiar rules that are often times seemingly arbitrary. What works one day might not work the next."

"How convenient," Emma commented, nodding her head. "It's like someone is just making the rules up as they go along."

"At least you're no longer in need of my constant assistance," Regina fought to keep the smile on her face, realizing that they were truly out of flimsy excuses to spend any more nights together.

Emma took a breath and stood up, "Yeah, hmm…so have you checked the book yet?"

"No, I'm not certain I want to read the interpretation of us," Regina feared the book would betray her thoughts and feelings. Part of her was afraid there would be nothing, but blank pages.

"Well, I do. Let's get it over with," the blonde walked across the room and retrieved the storybook, looking at it like Happy Gilmore looked at a golf ball 1 inch from the hole. "Shall we see if our experiment worked?"

They settled back on the couch, each holding a side of the book and Emma turned to where their last story had unfolded. Being a visual person, she flipped past the picture of them eating Chinese food on the couch and through the pages of text. There was indeed a new chapter in the book, titled "The Second Date: Mission Fate."

Emma's eyes widened as she read the title and flipped the page, while Regina sat stiffly by. The illustration was a composite of four images from their evening. The first was Regina and Emma on the sled at the bottom of the hill, Regina leaning into Emma's chest, her hands on her thighs, while they gazed at one another and smiled. The second showed them standing in the middle of the frozen pond, holding one another up and also gazing at each other. The third portrayed Regina and Henry kneeling over Emma right after her injury. The final image showed Regina and Emma standing in a snowy field: kissing passionately.

"I don't remember that part from last night, and those painkillers weren't that good," Emma leaned closer as Regina ran a finger over the image as if she was checking that it was really there on the page.

"How the hell did that happen?" she rolled her shoulders back and snatched the book from Emma, flipping back to the beginning and scanning through the story.

"Read it out loud," Emma urged, bumping her shoulder. She was dying to know why the book showed them kissing.

"No," Regina hissed, her face sporting an angry scowl as she took in the clunky fairytale language that the book was so fond of writing in, but then she read the first sentence:

"The Queen and the Savior concocted a plan to seal their fate together…" Regina paused, "This foolish book already misinterpreted our plan from the very beginning!"

She read on, "The Queen spent her day planning and preparing for the date, and the Savior eagerly anticipated spending time with The Queen and their son, Henry, he who has the heart of the truest believer…" 

"Get to the good stuff," Emma insisted, "go to the part where we were ice skating."

Regina flipped over to the next page and something caught her eye, "The book says I make the second best big pretzels in all the lands. That is a blatant lie. I know that I make the best pretzels…"

"That's what you're concerned about: that the book doesn't like your pretzels?" Emma laughed heartily, as Regina glared and moved the book away from Emma's view.

She continued to read: "The Queen found the Savior's novice attempt at skating and her resulting clumsiness adorable. She relished the opportunity to hold her hand and guide her around the ice. They raced around the pond, gaining confidence and comfort until they ran out of breath and abruptly stopped to hold each other close under the moonlight." 

"You think I'm adorable?" Emma beamed, grinning widely and flipping her hair over her shoulder to preen.

"It doesn't say that I think you are adorable, it said that I found your pathetic attempt at skating adorable. You don't need to twist things more than they already are," Regina blushed and found her place on the page.

"The Queen felt a sudden and insistent need to study the Savior's face, finding her even more adorable with her frost red cheeks and oversized stocking cap…" 

"That's the second time in two paragraphs that you've found me adorable," Emma smiled wider indulging in her certainty that Regina did in fact, find her unbelievably cute.

Regina only half heard Emma as she read the next sentence silently, "The Queen chastised herself for wondering what it would feel like to kiss her." 

Slamming the book shut, she stood up and placed it back in the desk drawer, locking it roughly.

"Hey, why are you putting the book in timeout…are you really that upset about your pretzels? Or the fact that I am so adorable even a metaphysical entity recognizes my charms?" Emma stood up and tried to read the brunette's dark expression.

"I just think that I've read enough for now," Regina pushed past without looking at her, "you must be famished. Shall I make some breakfast before you're on your way, Ms. Swan?"

Alarm bells sounded in Emma's head. Regina hadn't addressed her as 'Ms. Swan' for months. It was a sure sign she was distancing herself and that was the last thing that Emma wanted. She still hadn't gotten to know why the book showed the two women kissing. Knowing Regina well enough not to argue at this point, Emma decided she had better quickly take her up on that breakfast offer before she was shown the door.

"Yeah, sure, I could eat," she glanced back at the desk and rubbed her forehead as she followed Regina to the kitchen. She was going to get to the bottom of this sooner or later.


	8. Bacon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Nobody fears the height you all just fear the fall. Go to the edge sometime and prove your body wrong. You land badly, but you crash standing." ~Dessa

Emma found Regina in the kitchen beating eggs with a whisk. She was humming lightly as she busied herself pulling out ingredients from the cupboards and adding them to the egg mixture.

Henry was seated at the counter watching his mother. He turned to Emma as she walked in looking happy to see her and thankful for the distraction, "Morning Ma, your ankle is okay now?"

"Yeah, your mom did magic on it, and it's even better than it was before," Emma winked and smiled pulling up a stool to the counter and plopping down next to Henry.

"Better than before?"

"Yeah, it's extra springy. I can probably slam dunk now," Emma laughed as Henry shoved her playfully.

He leaned over and whispered in her ear, "She's feeling anxious and afraid."

They both watched as Regina sliced thick pieces of bread and drowned them in the egg, milk and cinnamon mixture before tossing the bread on the griddle.

"How do you know that?" Emma whispered back as she shifted in her seat and watched Regina. She looked a bit agitated, but not much different than usual.

"She's making French toast with whipped cream and berries," Henry replied his eyes widening comically as if that should set off a warning alarm.

Emma felt her stomach grumble, all she could think about is how delicious that sounded, "Yum."

"No, you don't understand. She always makes that when she's nervous about something. She made it the morning after I brought you to town," Henry added to exemplify his point, "and it was the super delicious."

"Oh," Emma nodded her head as she started to understand. "Something happened in the book, that's why she's upset."

They stared at one another for a moment until Regina turned her head their direction and they quickly schooled their features into matching looks of passive boredom. When Regina opened the fridge and stuck her head inside. Emma turned and whispered, "She has it locked in her desk and she doesn't even want me to see it."

"I can get it," Henry mouthed to her. Emma shook her head vehemently. There was no way Henry was going to read their currently developing story.

Regina's shoulders were slumped and she twirled her ring around her finger as she smiled falsely, "I hope you two are hungry. Henry, will you please set the table?"

Henry jumped dutifully and went to the cabinet to pull out plates and silverware. He carried them to the dining room, leaving Emma and Regina alone in the kitchen.

A long sigh escaped Regina's lips and she looked forlornly out the kitchen window. She didn't know what it was that she was feeling, but to see her every passing thought so clearly in black and white was frightening and she felt like she had less control over the situation than ever.

The blonde perked up and slid her arms forward; she felt the need to reassure the brunette that everything was going to be okay, "Whatever the book says isn't worth getting upset over. So what if it didn't like your pretzels?"

Regina turned toward the sink and pressed her palms down on the side of the counter, bowing her head, "It's not that. I'm not upset about the pretzels, and I'm not upset with you. I'm so done with my life being controlled by tattoos, books, and pixie dust."

The blonde jumped down from her stool and ran over to Regina, placing a hand on her shoulder and spinning her around. She looked into her eyes, "So don't let it be! Your whole thing is writing your own happy ending, right?"

Tears clouded Regina's eyes and her lip curled as emotion washed over her face. She shuddered and wiped her eyes, "Emma what if the book is—?" Regina stopped midsentence, her attention honing in just over Emma's shoulder. She blinked and pushed Emma out of the way, racing to the stove to put out a small grease fire that had erupted from the splattering bacon.

…

The fire was minor and the bacon was salvageable, just a bit crisp. Henry had arranged the plates and was sitting in the dining room waiting for a heaping plate of food placed before him. Emma felt tension wafting off of Regina in waves. She ate her French toast and bacon and made a point to tell Regina how delicious it was. It was definitely the best she'd ever had. The brunette just pushed her own food around her plate, and excused herself from the table.

"I took Mom's keys and got the book," Henry said quietly, his eyes scanning the doorway for any sign of Regina returning.

Emma winced at that news, and made a mental note that they needed to work on Henry's obedience, "Henry, I told you not to do that!"

Uncomfortably, she asked, "Uh, did you read it?"

"Yeah, I looked at it, but I didn't see any new stories and there were no pictures of you and mom. I put it back in the drawer so Mom wouldn't know that I took it," Henry looked disappointed and Emma felt relief wash over her. Maybe the book didn't want him to see? Emma puzzled it over for a few minutes and chalked it up to be just another weird rule of magic.

When she finished eating she found Regina in her study sitting at the desk looking at the book. It sat unopened and she had her hands on either side of it. Emma moved around to stand at Regina's side. She felt her heart rate increase at the prospect of looking at the book.

"I thought you were leaving after breakfast," Regina's tone was gruff and she shirked her shoulders.

"I'm like a cat: once I've been shown affection and fed, I'm not going anywhere," Emma tried to break the tension, but this didn't seem to be a moment for levity. She took a breath and asked, "Hey, remember when we said we were going to be completely honest with each other?"

"Yes," Regina replied coolly. She finally turned her gaze from the book and met Emma's eyes. "Why?"

"I just think if the book is adding in our thoughts and we're being honest with each other, there shouldn't be anything to worry over. That was the point of the date."

Emma opened the book and let the large pages flip past the images of the other cheery fairytales resulting in true love. Regina's eyes were narrowed, and she appeared agitated like she wanted to reach out and still Emma's hand. She closed her eyes and exhaled through her nose as Emma found their pages.

"Hmm, we're still here," she sounded distracted as she looked once more at the montage of pictures of the date and subsequent fictional kissing. It felt awkward to look at it, and she gritted her teeth, like she was preparing to rip off a band aid.

A passage caught her attention and she read out loud, "The Savior focused on the Queen's mouth, and found the sight before her mesmerizing."

Regina shifted in discomfort, but the point that Emma had perhaps wanted to kiss her too, made her pause. She shook it off, "We didn't kiss; the book is just making things up as it damn well pleases. I should be offended at the audacity."

"Well, maybe just because we both thought about it was enough for it to…you know, fill in the rest..."

"Yes, it just fills in the rest with its ever so insightful sense of imagination? And I didn't think about kissing you, I simply wondered what it might be like if- IF I was so inclined…an idle thought and very brief," Regina was agitated and defensive as she tried to downplay her actions, "Very inconsequential; practically non-existent."

"Okay, I get it, but that's not really what the book is saying. It seems we think about each other a whole bunch," Emma felt a bit rejected by how quickly Regina dismissed the idea of them together. She turned the page and wrinkled her nose as she read a bit more.

"We've spent a lot of time together and you were injured, of course I'm going to share some measure of base care and concern," Regina slammed the book closed, nearly hitting Emma's fingers. She stood up and walked over the couch, pulling the blanket over her lap, her mind racing.

"Um, so were you really checking out my stomach when I took my sweater off last night?"

Regina stared at her mouth agape and horrified. She exclaimed with irritation and embarrassment, "That's in the book?!"

Emma smirked at her reaction; her eyes twinkled and she murmured "No, it's not in the book. I just noticed the way you were looking at me."

Regina scoffed and stomped before she blurted out, "I'll have you know that when I woke up this morning you were very handsy with me in your sleep."

"I was not," Emma turned beet red and sounded incredibly unconvincing even to herself, recognizing that Regina was trying to change the subject. Though, in thinking about their night together, aside from the good secure feeling of having the brunette so close to her, she had a brief flash of a remembrance about the dream she had the night before. A surge of warmth flooded her body and she said, "Oh, I think I might know why the book added that bonus candid of us kissing."

"Because that book is a pervert and a voyeur?" Regina crossed her arms and yelled at the book. She looked like she wanted to spit on it as she fumed for it giving away all of her secrets.

"I may have dreamed about it," Emma looked away guiltily, "You can't get mad at me because I have no control over my dreams. Besides, I hardly think an image depicting two women kissing is perverted; I mean it's not like its going to corrupt any children who see it."

"Wait, you dreamed about kissing me and the book added in a handy visual?" Regina rubbed her forehead and then bunched her fists. Her frustration was mounting faster than she could dispel it. Her mind raced and she jumped up and grabbed the book, paging through to find the picture and study the offending illustration once more. A moment of familiarity hit her and she too remembered the soft touch of Emma's lips on hers in a dream that felt so far away, yet so real.

She clutched her necklace, as she felt a wave of pleasure and dizziness swirl over her, leaving her body buzzing from just the faint memory of a dream about kissing the other woman. She couldn't help but allow herself the indulgence of imagining how fine a real kiss would be; she'd probably spontaneously combust. She shook off the intrusive memory, side-eyeing the book, "Well, I do suppose that you're right in that we don't have control over what we dream about. Nor do we have any control over what this book decides to focus on. No mention of my healing your ankle with magic? Very convenient, Book. It's always ignoring my contributions no matter how significant."

Emma was starting to worry about the book's safety and well being, as Regina opened her hand and a small magic fireball poofed to life, "The book is just reporting on the facts as it perceives them, I think."

"And my pretzels? Is it fact that they are second best? Is it fact that I am drawn to you and feel a sense of safety security that I crave and have never known with anyone else when I'm wrapped up in your arms?" Regina squashed the fireball and whipped her head back, gaping when she realized she gave away far too much.

"I don't know," Emma said quietly, tilting her head at the admission. "Is it?"

"Never mind, it doesn't matter," Regina snapped as Emma stood and gently took her hands in hers, instantly calming her. She sat down beside her, placing one hand on her back and Regina shuddered.

"We can be upset with the book and what it says all day or we can just accept it, and live our lives," Emma nodded hopefully, an idea stirring in her mind. She looked at Regina and caught her eyes, "As far as what the book has said about me, it's true. I like being with you. I liked skating with you and it felt right for us to be close and cuddle. Our takeout and movie date was the best date I've ever had. And even though we didn't intend it to be a date, to me, it was."

The brunette thought for a few minutes, unsure of how to proceed with this new information, "I see, so what do we do about this- I mean us?"


	9. The End

Emma breathed in and breathed out slowly, the fine hair on the back of her neck prickling as she thought about doing something she had only dreamed about. She rubbed smooth circles over Regina's back, feeling her lungs expand and contract a bit faster and then hitch. Regina ran her finger up and down Emma's bare arm, and looked into her eyes, "You really should put your sweater on, dear."

"Not cold," Emma replied, searching the other woman's eyes for a sign that she was thinking about the same course of action to work toward the solution of their dilemma. "I'm kind of feeling hot, actually."

"Oh?" Regina ran her tongue over her bottom lip and leaned her head in a fraction of an inch closer. Her eyes glossed and her head filled with haze, she cursed her own weakness, but the thought endured.

They had to kiss. Regina wanted it, Emma wanted it. The book wanted it too.

The air felt charged with tension. Regina's heart was racing, her hands cool, yet damp with sweat. She felt acutely alert as though time had slowed and she could take in every detail. She let her fingers curl and tighten around Emma's forearm holding her securely and possessively. Their thighs touched together as they sat turned toward each other on the sofa.

Emma was ready. When she set off to help Regina with her happy ending she didn't imagine she'd be the one who could give it to her. That wasn't the help she had intended, but as the book developed their story, and their actions were spurred on by the book, it seemed natural. Not so much easy, because there was still a fair amount of pain and fear in the brown eyes looking back at her. There was also a sliver of longing and a sprig of hope.

It was only a kiss, such a simple act of intimacy and it was just to see what could or would happen when their lips touched. Emma pushed forward, resting her palms on the other woman's thighs and tilted her head, closing her eyes just a hairsbreadth from Regina's lips. She expected Regina to meet her lips and feel the softness and sweetness that she was sure their kiss would be.

She felt nothing, just air. She didn't move her head, but she opened to her eyes to find Regina pulled away, her knees against her chest and her head bowed down. Her hair fell forward covering her face.

"You should put on your sweater and go," Regina's voice cracked and she shifted uncomfortably, but never lifted her head. "I-I need some time to think."

Tears leaked out of Emma's eyes and she sniffled dryly as she slowly rose from her seat and feeling the force of the rejection she walked out. Regina spent a long while alone on the sofa, curled up and blank as the book lie lifeless and untouched.

…

The rest of the day passed quietly and Regina did her chores listlessly, her heart and mind burdened by unwanted and all too lonely feelings that came in painful waves. She had felt so close to happiness for a fleeting second, and then darkness washed over her and her fear was greater than her faith. She had retreated and let Emma, along with her security and warmth, leave.

The house felt cold and shadows danced on the wood floors as afternoon sunlight filtered in from the windows and the wind danced through the branches of trees. Regina felt numb and scattered, as she busied herself with laundry and dishes and tidying up spaces that were already tidy. She thought it would soothe her broken mind, but all it did was expand the emptiness.

Henry spent the day in his room, and she only caught sight of him when he wandered down for a glass of milk and a plate of cookies. He didn't need to look around for Emma; he could tell she was gone just from the mood in the house. The snow started falling at dusk, big puffy flakes that signaled it wouldn't be a hard snow, but it may accumulate. Regina watched the snow fall from her day bed; she had bathed and put on her pajamas and robe shortly after dinner. Henry had known better than to ask what had happened, and Regina didn't volunteer any information.

She felt tired, but awake. Her mind jumbled and more lost than ever before. When she turned out the light and crawled into bed she lie awake and let tears fall softly, streaking patterns down her cheeks and running off on her pillow.

…

Emma found herself in a similar state; she lay in bed, lay on the couch, sat at the counter, but her actions had no mindfulness behind them. She was simply a body moving through space and going through the motions of a person with a purpose. She had felt so sure that Regina would engage her and return the feelings that felt and did feel so strong in her heart and mind.

She didn't think she had misjudged Regina's intentions, but she knew Regina because she was just as easily scared and hurt as Emma was. They weren't alike in many ways, but they did understand each other in the most profound of ways. Emma bit the inside of her cheek to keep from screaming. She hated feeling anxious, and lost. She checked her phone time and again hoping for a text or call from Regina, but there was nothing. She imagined Regina taking a red pen to the book, and crossing out all of the words written about them. She ground her teeth as a searing headache erupted above her temple.

Their story was perfect as it was written, with all the shenanigans and false starts and unintentional looks, touches and care they had shown one another. In Emma's mind, it was as authentic as any other story in that book. Albeit, more modern: less hair climbing and dragon slaying, more ankle healing and cuddling. It was no less noble by any stretch of the imagination. Love was love, and Emma realized that's what she and Regina had. They may show it a bit differently than others, but all the signs and intentions were there.

Emma felt like if she could just talk to Regina, and get her to open up a bit more that she would come around. She couldn't leave things as they were. Maybe she did need time, but of all the things Emma was feeling patience wasn't one of them.

…

After three hours of feeling heartbroken, frightened, restless and lonely, Regina jumped out of bed and ran down to her study. She grabbed the book and retreated back to her room. She turned on the lamp by her night stand and began to read from the beginning. She perused through stories of bravery and some of blatant sexism, but each story culminated in a kiss of true love. She tried to tell herself she'd been luckier than some to have had true love more than once, but she'd lost it and suffered profoundly each time. Her heart was resilient, but only so resilient and even a rubber band would snap if when it was stretched out far enough.

She didn't glare or pass judgment on the stories for once; she simply sought to understand why she didn't have what all of those characters did. It was selfish of her to want a perfect love with someone who understood her and complemented her perfectly, and her frustration and anger bubbled up anew the more she thought about it.

Regina had been avoiding the last story in the book. She took a long ragged breath and turned to her and Emma's pages. The book had put a fancy insignia of a swan wearing a crown at the top of the page where their story began. She read it as her heart raced and tears leaked out of her eyes. It was strange to read about herself and to remember the events as they had occurred to her own perception. The insight she gleaned from Emma's thoughts as the book laid them out were insightful.

She was still upset that the book had revealed so many of her private thoughts, but she admitted that everything it printed was true. She knew that everything it said about Emma was true as well. She came to where she thought she and Emma's story had ended: a missed chance at a kiss.

"The Queen was not yet ready and so she drew away and closed herself off to the Savior, and a heavy cloud fell over the land and settled in both of their sad hearts." 

She read the last line of the story and rubbed at her red rimmed eyes, knowing she had blown her last chance. Out of habit, she turned the page and blinked in surprise. There was a new picture on the page. It was Emma, hair whipping around her face. She looked cold, and her eyes were teary, but she looked determined. Snowflakes swirled around her and she was standing under a bright light. Regina studied it until she was startled by a loud knock.

She flung herself out of bed, and raced downstairs. Her heart was beating wildly and her eyes were prickling with tears. She opened the door and there was Emma. Standing under the porch light, looking cold, determined and sad as snowflakes swirled around her. Regina's lips parted and she let her head fall against the doorframe as relief washed over her. Emma took a step forward and they looked into each other's sad, but hopeful eyes.

This time there was so hesitation or second guessing. Emma cupped Regina's cheeks with both hands and drew her chin up gently. She used the pads of her thumbs to wipe away her tears and pushed their lips together in a perfect kiss. They stood under the light, as snow flurries fell onto their eyelashes, and kissed passionately. The heaviness in the air immediately lifted and the blanketing sense of warm, safety and love rushed in to take its place. Regina's heart was open and Emma took up residence in it, finally feeling she was home.

"And they lived happily ever after" materialized in ink in the book and one final image imprinted on a page all by itself to match the other fairytale endings: the Queen and the Savior sharing true love's kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Debating adding a NC-17 epilogue, sort of the adult book version...that Book is kind of a voyeur.


End file.
